Forty Is the New Twenty

Shammy Narayanan
3 min readMar 13, 2019

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Few months back, when I turned forty, to me it was a nonchalant event. I was least prepared towards the onslaught of tidal waves of change. In a few days, conspicuously salutation changed from “Bro” to “Uncle”, unsolicited advices to stay fit aka daily 30 min brisk walk became the order of the day and my morning coffee became less sweeter day by day. Hail Mary!! These changes were not only confined to me, but were deeply pervasive in my network. The rate of extinction of my flashy tees was faster than a family of Orangutans. BTS Caller/ Ring tones were replaced with “kandha sashti kavasam”. In my booklet of life, turning forty is not a simple parchment but a phenomenon of embarking into a life changing event. Collectively does this experience increase happiness? Or to put it in simple terms, how does Happiness Quotient change with age?

“Happiness” is a subjective word and its measurement is not as straight-forward as we presume. On the contrary, today global studies and research on this topic do exist and the results are intriguing. It all drills down to the fact that, Happiness decreases with progression of the 40’s irrespective of nation, culture and economic conditions. However, this trend reverses itself to what we refer to as a “U” turn in the early 50’s in developed nations. In under developed and developing nations, the dip either continues or plateaus but unfortunately never reverses. This point of inflection is clinically termed as “Mid-Life Crisis”. The inescapable question of “Mortality” sets the pace of mid-life crisis. The human mind always responds to this in a dichotomous pattern.

An overwhelming emotion of wasted opportunity, makes an individual to retreat into a shell and surrendering to the flow of events. This pessimistic approach, impairs their ability to take risks leading to a spiraling abyss. It is the nemesis of happiness and the genesis of depression. They confine to the available finite resources and are deeply vulnerable to any dynamic changes that happen to their surroundings. In a nutshell, they become breathing zombies.

In the other category of individuals, the same fear of mortality sets in the pace of acceptance, renewing the spirit of optimism. When they encounter injustice and prejudices, they engage more comfortably choosing to combat than cave-in. Increased level of tolerance espouses their efforts to subdue the undercurrent of negativity. Such mindset, directs their effective utilization of cognitive resources leading to a wider network of people and opportunities. This new-found maturity increases the happiness quotient to levels much more than their pre-40’s. In brief, they firmly believe “World is not out to get at them”

Its interesting to see the inevitable fear of mortality polarize the population into two distinct groups. One living with perpetual vulnerability while the other with palpable spirit of liberty. Mindset and the culture are the primary drivers which decisively determines the outcome. With increase in average life expectancy these results underscore the greater importance of behavioral health in the early forties

When it’s easy to preach on being positive the ever-increasing mortgage bills, Healthcare costs and social stigma pragmatically pushes us back into a confined cave of reticence. To suppress and surpass this dogma of negativity, we need to manoeuvre beyond the visible contours of tactical life and set the vision on the higher calling, the purpose of life. To every man and woman in forties, standing at this crossroads we have an important choice to make, and when we do that

We shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I —

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

Happy Ageing

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